We made it…through my first ever blog and also the January Blues!! Now we fall head over heels into February…the month of LOVE! Ever heard the saying; “charity begins at home”, well I thought to myself what better way to tackle this month but by choosing to LOVE OURSELVES. After all, how can we expect anyone else to love us, if we aren’t kind, caring and considerate to ourselves first and foremost. So, this month I am going to talk to you about;
“With self-compassion we give ourselves the same kindness and care we would give to a good friend”
If self-compassion is the same as compassion for others, why do we not treat ourselves the same as we treat others? How is it that we can be kind, caring and considerate to our best friends yet we fail to check in with how we treat ourselves? By choosing self-compassion you choose kindness, calmness and safety which has a positive impact on your body at a biological level.
“Self-compassion is a way of relating to ourselves kindly, embracing ourselves as we are, flaws in all”.
Kristin Neff, the “self-compassion evangelist”, describes the three core components of self-compassion as;
- Self-Kindness: you accept that you are where you are right now.
- Common Humanity: you are not alone in your struggle, it is part of being human and we are all in this together.
- Mindfulness: you observe your thoughts and feelings without judgement. Be with your suffering.
Why not start treating ourselves like we treat a good friend with encouragement, understanding, empathy, patience and gentleness? Why not try simply changing your self-talk to be kinder and gentler or why not try writing down what you would say to a friend but then re-reading it as if it was to yourself or how about just acknowledging and embracing how you are feeling at any given moment. Give it a go… LOVE YOURSELF!
Why not try this self-compassion exercise;
For more helpful tools on self-compassion visit;
On a more serious note, if you are feeling down on a regular basis, or feel like you’re stuck in a rut that you just cannot get out of, it is worth speaking to someone about how you are feeling. Reach out, do not suffer alone & remember…
“It’s Okay not to be Okay & It’s absolutely Okay to ask for help!”
The article is written by Leanne, Trainee Counsellor at The DMC Clinic. If you would like to discuss how any of the topics mentioned above are impacting your mental health, please contact The DMC Clinic to arrange an appointment.